Twirly Tuesday: The Bouquet Toss Saga

Twirly Tuesday: The Bouquet Toss Saga

Fab Tuesday Twirlies!! Today’s Twirly Tuesday post is a bit of a quirky one. Definitely something different from our usual which I’m pretty excited about and I am sure will lighten up your mood a tad bit! It’s an easy breezy read from the lovely Charlene Newman.Happy reading!

Last Saturday. I went to a wedding. Now I’m lying here, this wet morning trying to playback all events leading to my sprained ankle and why I took for granted all the days that my ankle wasn’t sprained. I mean I can’t even walk to go get waakye. Imagine that!

Why do bad things happen to good people?

I am wedding lover, no doubt. I mean what’s there not to love about weddings???…free drinks ,free food, music, exciting people, annoying people, drama (if u are lucky).

I have even been to weddings that don’t concern me. In other words I knew not the bride nor groom. Lol

But this very Saturday, my friend’s cousin was getting married. I had waited so long for this day, even bought new shoes koraaa…yes I wore new ‘wele’…

At about 8am I was awake, did my usual and then took a trip to the seamstress to check on the dress I initially wanted to wear but I eventually changed my mind and wore something else.

By 12pm I had had my bath and was seated with a mirror before me like an Egyptian queen (or I’d like to think so). So many brushes, powders, lipsticks and all. It was make up time. Skilful face painting with a touch of luxury. I doubt the bride even spent so much time on her face. Matter of fact I had taken the wedding so personally. In about an hour I was through but I suffered a wardrobe malfunction, my zip refused to close, I wrestled with it…and yes..I lost the battle.

Had to rush back to the seamstress to get a new zipper fixed. My cousin (my clyde aka ride or die) had already arrived. By 2pm we set off. Got to the venue and spent some time indoors with some vodka and some jollof and some tilapia as if we were professional ‘tasters’ and our opinion on the food mattered.

An hour later guests had started taking their seats. The reception opened with a prayer. A rather long one, after which drinking began.. I know what you want to say. Just don’t.

Anyway soon came food time (woop woop 💃)

I had pre-scanned the table so I knew exactly what I wanted. I walked straight to the fufu section and got myself a bowl my friend was serving the soup, she was really generous with the meat, God bless her.

I walked back to my table majestically, my head high trying not to spill any soup or drop the bowl because I was the only fine girl with fufu and people noticed (who say fine girl no dey chop fufu?) Lmao. Back at the table all I could see was rice, rice, rice, banku, banku eeiii asem ben nie. My cousin too was with a very tiny serving of apapransa (palmnut soup,mixed with corn meal and some beans. Best description I can give) I then proceeded to wash my hands and enjoy the fruit of my labour. I mean after all those heavy stares I deserved it.

I was still wondering why none of the young men on our table didn’t opt for fufu, I may have asked my cousin loudly cos this nice guy seated next to me responded by saying he wasn’t aware that there was fufu so he had banku instead. Being the kind and naturally giving person that I am I shared mine with him. After the food my attention shifted back to the booze but our table had ran out of vodka…

We noticed some tables hadn’t opened theirs so we decided to rob them and guess who was sent on that mission?? Yes!!! Good old me!!!

I took about three steps and there was an announcement .”Where are the single ladies?..single ladies come up here the bride is about to throw her bouquet ” that’s all I needed to hear. I quickly dashed up there and took my position….”One….Two…Threeeeee” the bouquet was up in the air and landed safely in my hands. That was when another eager single lady obviously more single than I am gave me a push that got me preventing a fall with my right foot leading to the sprain…I grabbed my bouquet with both hands and limped my way to the closest seat. Most of the chairs were empty anyway, you know Ghanaians, after eating nooor awaaaay…

I took my new shoes off…emphasis on new..walked(limped) barefooted back to my table and had a mother of twins massage my foot (for it is believed they have some powers to heal broken bones and sprained muscles and all)

The pain did not stop me…I resumed the mission..brought a bottle of wine back to my table..and danced the night away….

By Charlene Newman (Ices D’Goddess)

Charlene is a single, fun loving, party girl who loves exploring the motherland, Ghana and is a budding travel, lifestyle, food and drink blogger. Check out her blog sometime



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